When Women Reach Out

I cannot tell you how many times over the last few years that we have been living overseas that I have found myself battling back the gathering clouds of loneliness. Perhaps a stretch of days or weeks when I just felt so isolated from family or friends or maybe even just a moment in the day when an idea popped into my head and I wanted to throw it out to someone and it wasn't possible. It can be hard this part of living as a missionary.

On the other hand, I also cannot possibly begin to count all the ways I have been blessed by women who have reached out beyond all the challenges of a friendship with someone with a sketchy Skype connection, and chaotic life and ride the emotional roller coaster of this journey with me. Some of them have shown up as strangers and left as friends. Some walked into a conference with me and now walk through life with me. Some are old friends that have had to figure out a new plan for maintaining closeness in this phase of life.

We've had to work through stuff. I've gotten it wrong more than a couple of times. But some very beautiful life-giving relationships have been born in these years and I count them among my greatest blessings.

I know social media and the blog world have their flaws, but for me, they have been a sanity saver. I have met and also maintained relationships with some amazing women that could have only been possible through their help. One of the ways I have found sisterhood and community online is through the the (in)courage community groups.

They are small groups of women connecting over something that draws them together. And oh the connections I have made! If you are looking to dig into relationships and find a safe place to reach out to other women, I strongly encourage you to check out this list of groups for the spring session and join one. Registration starts today and goes all week. If you happen to be a fellow missionary or someone working in or interested in global care, I will be co-leading a group just to encourage you! You can join us here!

Today, in the aftermath of a full scale medical mission that now looks like it blew up in my kitchen, and a house full of kids with scratchy throats and stuffy noses, I would like nothing more than to sit down with a friend over a warm cup of joe and make it all make sense. Won't you join me at our virtual kitchen table? I'll be waiting with warm Costa Rican coffee. Now that's an offer I know you can't refuse.

On Nigeria and Not Looking Away

I wasn't planning to post about slavery and justice and hard stuff that I don't know what to do about tonight.
I wasn't planning to talk about Nigeria and school girls and terrorist kidnappers and abductions.
I wasn't.

But I am.

Even though I do not know what to tell you to think or say or do about it. Even though I cannot think of any possible way we can help this specific situation right now. I am going to make sure I put it before your eyes. Because I have an all too familiar ache in my stomach.

As I read head lines and shared stories tonight and wished the world would wake up from its sleepy acceptance of horrors as far-away issues that have little to do with us, I realized that I had to speak in some way.

Because girls should be able to celebrate making it to the day they sit for their final exams in school with a Coke and shared giggles. They should not be kidnapped in a mass raid by terrorists that have long threatened their region. They should not sit at home afraid that an education may cost them the little freedom they have.

But that is happening, people. Tonight. In your world. In your global neighborhood.

I was going to share all the links here for you to click over and read. But you know what. I'm not. You do it. Google it. Read it. Educate yourself. I'm laying down a challenge. If you don't know what I am talking about, make it your responsibility to find out.

After that, I am not sure what to tell you to do next. Heck, I am typing red-faced fury into the keyboard because I don't know what else to do.

But you know what? I am tired of us ignoring injustice because we can't fix it, because we can't impose a comfortable solution and walk away, raise a little cash and throw it at a problem. And when we can't, squirming uncomfortably and shuffling our feet quietly over to the next conversation.

If we are going to be justice walkers and mercy lovers and freedom fighters, we've got to learn to sit and suffer in the hard stuff. The stuff for which there is no easy fix.

We have to acknowledge the gut-wrenching realities of rape and incest and trafficking and slavery and orphans and AIDS epidemics and tornadoes and floods and our ineptitude in it all and just sit in that brokenness, bleeding sweat if it is all that we can do. But caring passionately enough about the broken ugliness of our world that at the very least its sweat and tears and desperate prayers are worth are our company.

Let us not fall into lazy slumber at the world's agony. At a school girl's agony. At her mother's cries across the oceans of dark night. Please. Sit with them. Sit with me.

I don't know what to do. But I will not look away for my own comfort.

I can pray. I can keep company with the broken and the hurting of the world. I can light a candle and send a flicker of mercy across the oceans of pain.

If you light yours too, if we keep vigil together in the midst of the world's agony, then maybe, just maybe, we can light a path to freedom together. And maybe Spirit fire will blaze in a heart somewhere and someone will discover a calling that leads to a solution, that leads to freedom.

Let's keep company with the more than 230 families wondering where their daughters are right now. Let our legacy be that we refused to look away when there were no easy answers.

I can see your candle flickering from here.

Stay Inspired: Twenty (or So) TED Talks for 2014

So I've been brewing a little love affair with TED talks lately. Well, actually, I've been brewing a love affair with the notion of TED talks, because, well, I never really seem to find time to actually listen to them. I just look wistfully at the link and think, "Oh, I want to hear that. That would be so good. I bet I could find so much inspiration there." And then I don't.

But I am vowing to bring my relationship with TED to the next level in 2014. Because I like to keep learning stuff. And I like to give and hear talks just about as much as I like to write and read stuff. Words inspire me, help me learn.

Because this relationship is in the crush phase and I have no idea how actually hard it is going to be to invest in it, I started all realistic with the title "12 Ted Talks for 2014". Then I found a link with ten all in one that I want to watch. So I changed the title to "20 Ted Talks...". Then a friend shared a link to another talk that she said was a must watch. So, I just cut myself a little slack and named it "Twenty or So...." So now I don't have to count and have all the liberty in the world to bite off more than I can chew. And I will.

I probably won't listen to all of these. I may find some others to listen to. I might only listen to one or two. But I know it will be good. So I'm going to go ahead with my growing list.

So, here's the list I'm starting with by category:

Self-Care/Inspiration:
Brene Brown on Vulnerability
Glennon Doyle's Lessons From the Mental Hospital
Kristen Neff on Self-Compassion
Summer Beretsky on Anxiety

On Thinking Creatively:
Elizabeth Gilbert on Creative Genius
Arthur Benjamin on Mathemagic
The Creative Spark Playlist

Alternative Education:
Kevin Robinson: How Schools Kill Creativity
Ken Danford: School is Optional
Every Kid Needs a Champion
I already watched this one, but don't miss it.

Non-Profit Success and Leadership:
Chris Marlowe: What If Doing Good Was Simple?
This list of ten talks from the Stay Classy blog on philanthropy and leadership.
How Great Leaders Inspire Action

Culture and Global Issues:
The Danger of a Single Story
Jane Chen on the Embrace Baby Warmer
A Midwife's Story: How Midwives Can Save Lives From the Horn of Africa
Our Century's Greatest Injustice from the co-author of Half the Sky
Social Experiments to Eradicate Poverty
Invest in Africa's Own Solutions

Next week, I'll share the list I am making for my teenage son.

Do you have favorite TED talks that have inspired you? Ones that you think would be great for a teen list? From whom are you finding inspiration in the priority areas of your life right now?